January 17, 2011


It's still snowing here. I love winter, I was born during a blizzard and I think that snow is beautiful from early Nov. until early Jan. Then I am ready for it to go away and I am especially ready to be done moving it. I had to shovel my way out of my house today so that I could get to work. Not my idea of a good time.

I'm leaving for Kansas City, MO on Thursday for the Youth Ministry Network Extravaganza for my continuing education and I can't wait!!! I'm road-tripping there with my friend Kristina, and then I'm rooming with Kristina and Julie :) It should be a good time. But before we leave for that I need to drive to my parents house- where I'll be leaving my car. Let's just hope that my car makes it there. My heator core went out so the smell was anti-freeze NOT a dead mouse. Fixing the heator core is waayyy more expensive then removing a dead mouse. And the fog on my windows wasn't fog- it's the anti-freeze condensing on my windows. Yum. (Note the sarcasm.) Mr. Boyfriend did some calling around for me on Saturday to see how much it would cost to fix it and we're looking at anywhere from 500 to 700 bucks or more. Kelly Blue Book says my car is only worth $500. What's a girl to do?

My orignal plan was to work until 5 on Wednesday then leave for my parents house and have dinner with them and Mr. Boyfriend but with all the funerals that we're having at my church that plan has been changed for me. We had one funeral this morning at 10:30, we have another tomorrow morning, a prayer serivce on Wednesday night, and a 3rd funeral on Thursday morning. Since one of our Pastors is in Africa with a group  of people from church doing some learning, some volunteer work, some visiting the girls our church sponsors, ect. our other Pastor is left to do all of these services by himself. BUT it's also a confirmation week (we only have confirmation every other week- yes I know it's a dumb schedule but I didn't make it). So now I will have to teach confirmation by myself for the 1st time EVER!!! Then I will be able to leave for my continuing ed after that. I'm excited about teaching confirmation but terrified at the same time.

One of the blogs that I follow is The Anderson Crew ( http://andersonfamilycrew.blogspot.com/ ) and last week she wrote while she was at starbucks having "me" time about how she felt kind of iscolated and lonely after moving across the country with her busby and kids. They are totally the same feelings that I have here in my Nothern Town. I feel like I don't have friends here and I miss that girl-bond. Like on Saturday night Mr. Boyfriend and I were watching the Miss America Pagent and he made some "boy" comment about the contestant that sang an Italian Opera for her talent. And all I could think (and say for that matter) is "I wish I had a girl to watch this with!" And it's so true, I want friends here. I want this to feel like home and a place where I want to be. But it doesn't. I have a job, which is great in this economy and I have a roof over my head but something is missing. I come to work and I go home where I sit by myself, and then some nights I come back for meetings or youth group or whatever. I'm not looking to go out every night and get wild and crazy but it would be nice to have girlfriends to watch The Bachelor with tonight or girls just to talk to. All of the girls here that I talk to are either in high school and in my youth group, or 5 years older then me and they're moms already so they're at a different place in their lives. Which is fine, I'm happy for them and I love their kids but there comes a point where I don't want to hear about their games, or their drama, or their doctor appointments anymore. I want to talk about current events (even if they are only reality show current events), I want to talk about shoes and clothes, I want someone who is in the same life stage as I am to be my friend here. And I don't know how to find her. So far in my life, I have been forced to spend time with a concentrated group of people close to my age. All the way through elementary, middle, and high school it was the same kids. My bestie from high school and I have been really great friends since 6th grade. Then it was off to college and everyone there was in the same boat that I was. We were all living away from home for the first time and we were all experiencing college for the first time. We bonded over a common experience and it was wonderful, what I wouldn't give to go back to college. Now, here I am learning how to be a grown up all on my own and there isn't anyone to go through this with. It's lonely. I know that I'm here for a reason, I just wish it was easier to be here.

Sorry this was kind of a bummer of a post.

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